Babies on the way...

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Didn't I say that I am not having any more chicks this year? Remember the blog about chickens in the house, poop on the deck, et cetera? I really meant it.

Now, one of my hens begins disappearing, but not so long a time that I get suspicious. She doesn't act broody. Time goes by.

Today, I saw her face off against the miniature rooster, Albert, and she was riled! Feathers flared to maximum stand-up, head down, growling like a bear. Oh, no... she's got a nest somewhere.

So, I looked, and looked, and finally found a lovely warm nest in the aviary, open since the quail and pheasants were released. She has 15 large brown eggs, well on their way to becoming chicks in my yard. What can I do? I am not capable of trashing the eggs because I didn't plan this. So, it's chicks for us this year.

They will be good layers; put in your order now!

Words that creep me out

phlegm

meconium

smear

gobble

slice

beeble

scab

gag

slick

hernia

crust

maggot

Heat wave, country style

It's hot. I know what my blog heading says 'blogging and slogging, et cetera; so I haven't changed it.

Anyway, I am talking triple digits and high humidity and no air conditioning. And an irrigation pump that is non-functioning. Well, it spits at the poor trees and bushes. That's because the pond is low, and the pump is in the pond.

And the pool is broken.

And George is in Alaska for the fourth week this summer.

I think I am getting cranky, but there is no one home to know or to complain, so probably not.

I have fans everywhere (not the cheering or stalking type). I have a bucket of cold water in front of my chair to soak my feet. I hose down the chickens and their pens and the front of the house. I keep wiping the granddog with a cool wet cloth (after which he thinks he has had a bath and does laps around the house, snorting and spraying spit like a Rain-bird sprinkler). It is eighty-six in the house before noon. Going up the stairs is like entering a sauna.

I called all over for air-conditioners; 'No, sorry, all out. We have two arriving from China tonight. I can hold spot number three hundred twelve on the waiting list, if they are not purchased...' Thanks, no... But, wait; Home Depot has some. 'Hurry, they are going fast' 'Can you hold two for me?' 'No, ma'am, I'm not supposed to...' Pout. Whine. Pause... 'Well, get here in ten minutes...' 'I can do that!'

Then, on the way, a damn cop stopped me because some old asshole wouldn't let me merge, speeding up to cut me off in the merge lane, flashing his lights and flipping me off. I didn't get a ticket, just allowed some other woman's husband (the cop) to give me a little lecture on driving, all the while trying to set him on fire with my eyes. (I have my own husband to lecture me, dummy, go home and torture your wife...) He didn't even see the old shit asking for trouble. And my telling him about it didn't save me from the lecture...

Anyway, by the time I got inside Home Depot (actually, the lecture occurred in the parking lot), some sweet citizen had ripped the 'hold for' sign off the a/c units, threw it on the floor and took them. I was not pleased. But, way high on the bare shelves, I spotted some boxes that looked promising. The clerk assured me that those were not the ones I wanted. I climbed like a monkey, drawing alarmed cries from the clerk, and said, 'Ah, ha! I want these!' 'And, I want the display model!' I was on a roll. I would have bought ten if they had them. At $200 a pop. The clerk begged me to come down.

I called my sister, who was at that point still unsuccessful in her quest for an a/c unit, and then I hovered over my two carts like some crazy bag lady until she got there. People went by, slowing to look at the a/c's, and I would advance, placing a hand on the cart handle. They would look up smiling, only to freeze like that when they saw my face. I don't know, but I'm guessing I looked hot and sweaty and fed up and on-the-edge. I had had it with traffic, cops, lectures, selfish stealing consumers, trying to climb safely with a fat young man screaming like a girl, and now, waiting.

Finally, I got home with my loot. My nephew came over to install the units. Things are beginning to cool, about a degree every six hours. But, I am sitting in front of one, feet in a bucket of water, iced lemonade in my hand, wet washcloth on my neck, the picture of American consumerism and capitalism at work. And, I figure, the money I saved not getting a ticket and not being arrested for bitch slapping that old fart more than covered the cost of the air conditioners!

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There must be others out there just like me!

My dad said I could trip over the pattern in the linoleum, my husband says he knows why my parents didn't name me Grace. Is there a pattern here? (If there is, I'll probably trip over it...)

Know your meds

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I am constantly amazed that many smart, health conscious folks have big gaps in their knowledge about common over-the-counter medications, and their own prescribed medication, for that matter.

One thing that I hope that I passed along to my kids before they left home was a few rules:

1. Don't take anything that you don't know what is.

2. Take each medication for a specific symptom, one drug at a time.  Never take multiple symptom relievers, like Cold and Flu medication.

3. Do not take medication from anyone if it does not come in a bottle or package you can read.

4. Throw out outdated medication.

5. Never take a partial course of antibiotics.  Take them all as they are prescribed.  

6. Don't take someone else's prescribed medication.  This is not only stupid, but illegal.

Having said that, here is a little glossary for you to learn the generic equivalent of common drugs:

Acetimenophen.................Tylenol

Acetylsalicylic acid.........Aspirin, abbreviated ASA

Antihystamine...................A medication that counters the allergic reaction in the body by protecting cells from the irritation of hystamine release.  These include Benadryl, Chlor Trimeton, Loratidine, and these:

 

First-Generation OTC Antihistamines

• Brompheniramine (brand names: Dimetapp Cold & Allergy Elixir, Robitussin Allergy & Cough Liquid)
• Chlorpheniramine (one brand name: Singlet)
• Dimenhydrinate (one brand name: Dramamine Original)
• Diphenhydramine (some brand names: Benadryl Allergy, Nytol, Sominex)
• Doxylamine (two brand names: Vicks NyQuil, Alka-Seltzer Plus Night-Time Cold Medicine)

Second-Generation OTC Antihistamines

• Loratadine (some brand names: Alavert, Claritin)

Diphenhydramine...........Benadryl.  Benadryl is an effective antihystamine.  That means that if you react allergically to something, this drug can counter the effects of the allergic reaction, which is a hystamine reaction.  It also makes you drowsy.  It is the PM in just about every over-the-counter sleep aid, like Midol PM, Advil PM, Tylenol PM.  Refer to number 2, above.

Ibuprofen...........................Advil

NSAIDs...............................Nonsteroidal antiinflammatory drugs, including ibuprofen (Advil, Motrin, Nuprin, Excedrin IB, Midol IB, Genpril, Haltran, etc.), naproxen (Naprosyn, Aleve, Anaprox, Naprelan, Synflex), COX-2 inhibitors (e.g. prescription brand Celebrex)

A special note about aspirin:  there is no such thing as baby aspirin, that is, any aspirin intended for babies.  It is an old fashioned, outdated term that refers to 81 milligram aspirin tablets formulated by Bayer Company to taste like orange so that children would take them.  We now know that children under eighteen should NEVER take aspirin unless prescribed by a doctor, because of the potential for deadly Reyes' disease.  Many Americans take a daily 81 mg. aspirin for heart disease prevention, and some are flavored, some are coated with 'enteric coating', meaning that they will dissolve in the intestines, not the stomach, thereby preventing stomach bleeding or upset.  Don't give kids aspirin!

Well, this is only a start.  If it is helpful, let me know.  It is just a favorite subject of mine.  I want you to know what you are ingesting and why, and not take anything extra.

You get my point, though, right?  Brand names get in the way, and are often a reason people spend too much money on over-the-counter medication, or don't realize what they are taking because we refer to the brand name commonly.

Consumerism

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I wanted to buy some predatory nematodes.  Crane fly larvae are lumping up my lawn and the gross and fragile and weird flying adults are in my house, on my floor, and irritating me to no end.  So, I went to the local nursery to get some eater-bugs to control them.  

There were several sizes of the little eater-creatures; 100,000 or 500,000 or 1 million.  In a little container thing that I mix with water and sprinkle on my lawn.  Each with a price that reflects the quantity.

The thing is, how do I know how many I am getting?  You can't see them without a microscope, and I don't carry one around.  I posed the question to the clerk; 'How do I know that there are a million or 2,315 in this container?'.  He said, 'Well, you have to trust us.'  "Xcuse me??"  I would never trust someone like that if the commodity was, say, caviar, or broccoli!  'Do you have a microscope so I can check this myself?'  I ask.  'No.'  'How about a statement from the farmer saying that s/he legally confirms that there are X amount of predatory nematodes in this sample?'  'No'.

This is a consumer fraud in the making.  I am telling you, you can pay for a million and get twenty thousand or two!  No way to know!  And, how do you come back on a fraudulent distributor?  In a civil suit, do you say, 'Well, it seemed to me that the lawn was lumpier than if one million nematodes were munching away, rather than less than I had paid for.  I'd say it was more like 250,000.'  Or, 'Yeah, there were, like, fifty more adult crane flies that I had to kill rather than the twenty I'd have had if a million nematodes were in my lawn.'  

This is an overlooked area of consumerism.  We gardeners need to contact our congressmen in order to be able to buy predatory nematodes with confidence!

Swine flu

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Well, the swine flu is making it's second run on Pacific Northwesterners.  Shoulda been over by now, but, it seems, the best may be yet to come.  My community has two dozen stricken hospitalized, fiver of whom are in ICU.

Unlike seasonal viral influenza, this guy seems to go after young people, from late teens to twenties.  It is speculated that it finds a host in the people who have not had exposure to similar viruses in the past, therefore less resistance to H1N1.

So, even though it is nice and summery out there, avoid large crowds in an enclosed setting, like closely packed air conditioned places.  Keep your hands clean, washing or gelling frequently, especially after shopping, opening doors, or using a public pen or charge pad or ATM.  Keep your hands and pencils away from your face; mouth, eyes, nose, cheeks.  If you use a spice shaker at a table, wrap it in a napkin or gel after, especially if you are then going to eat finger food.  Use straws when drinking from a reusable glass, lest it be inefficiently cleaned.  

If you are around someone in public who is coughing, has a runny nose, looks flushed or not well, leave and wash your hands.  If you are a captive of the circumstances, put on a mask.  No kidding.  If you go to a health facility with symptoms like that, they make you put on a mask. Since the other person probably wouldn't take the suggestion well, protect yourself and put one on.  In the unlikely event that someone asks, tell them 'darned allergies'.  

Masks are available at any health facility or to purchase at Wal Mart, Walgreen's, etc.  Get one that protects you from germs and virus, not just dust and pollen.  Those are known as 'nuisance' masks, and won't protect you from H1N1 or any other critter.  Ask the pharmacist or pharmacy tech.

We are not out of the woods on this flu season yet.  Protect yourself.  I don't wanna see ya in the hospital...

Possibility for a hillside home

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Images of time

These are images of clocks that I found on Google Images.  They are so cool, I wanted to share them with you.

Five years and counting

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My mother-in-law is eighty nine.  She began a 'five year plan' last year.  By that, I mean that she began to define her remaining life expectancy as five years or thereabout.  It seems strange to hear someone cheerfully discuss their own life's end in such a matter-of-fact way.  But, ever the nurse and accepting listener, I encouraged her to share openly.

There is a reason for my doing so, even though it can be uncomfortable and sad.  When my mom was sixty-two and began to discuss her own death, the disposition of her belongings, her last wishes, etc., I shut her down. My own fear could not allow her to share her last wishes at what turned out to be a critical time in her life; her last months on earth.  I vowed never to be that selfish and self centered again.  

How could I deny a person the opportunity to discuss their own death because of the discomfort I felt?  Obviously, I still feel some guilt about this.  I can only be a better listener for my mother-in-law.

I asked her how it felt to be discussing her impending death.  She shrugged and said, 'Well, it makes you realize that you better not put things off.  If you want to do something, do it while you're well enough and have the time.'  We then progressed to laughing about how much loot I get to end up with.

Having lived through both, I can tell you that it is better this way.  It is a gift of love for one to overcome one's own fear and anticipatory grief in order to allow a loved one to discuss not just life, but death.

Tapped out

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I am out of give.  I am tired beyond the point that rest and sleep help.  I am desperate for a month of no giving to others, to follow my schedule, to clean up only after me, to please only me, to not listen to the woes and whines and whispers of others.  I am strong, but right now, I am not.

I feel so deeply sad and tired and full to bursting in my chest.  I look at my schedule, at the things I need to get done, at the people who are depending on me to take care of them and their problems and be ever available to them, and I get scared and frustrated and futile all at once.

How can I go to work and give to needy patients when I can't give to myself?  Where do I go to get help, acceptance, respite, and safety?

Err- runs

Don't you hate it when you buy something and it's not the:

--right size

--right color

--right quality

--one you thought it was

--thing your husband said to get

--whatever

--?????

Then, you're stuck with the damn thing until you can return it.  That is, if you can get it back in the packaging.  Or find the receipt.  Or are going in that vicinity in the next two years.

Ideally, one ought to plan these returns in order to preserve time and gas.  Ha.  I never seem to quite get it right, either forgetting the receipt, spacing out my intentions, or someone will borrow the car, taking the thing(s) out of the back seat and placing them who-knows-where.  Or I do.  I then discover them months later, with faded receipt and now-unreturnable merchandise.

That's why I call them Err-runs.

Pooh-pooh Poulan

I am disappointed in my new Poulan tree trimmer.  I earlier shared how I returned the first one because it was assembled incorrectly, putting my nephew and I in danger of having fire fall from the trees onto us.  The next trimmer worked great for about six hours, then started to crap out, acting persnickety and running intermittently.

We ended up exchanging that one, too.  When my nephew took it back to the store, the manager said 'That's the third one you are getting!'  'Yes, I know'  he conceded.  Then, 'Are you sure you know what you are doing with it?  I mean, did you check the mix on the oil and fuel, and eveything?'  'Well,' Clayton replied, 'I'm pretty savvy about power tools, and, considering that this is an electric trimmer, the problem isn't the fuel.'  The manager ended his pompous lecture right then and there.

So, we are on the third trimmer to finish the driveway trees. Granted, it's a big job, but I spent over $120.00 on this thing.  It should last longer than six hours!

I am disappointed.  As you might remember, I have waited a long time and wanted one for a long time.  I have tree trimmer disenchantment.  

Where there is frog poop...

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My family and I have an on going love affair with Pacific Chorus Frogs.  We introduce and nurture them wherever we go, creating little ponds to place the eggs in for hatching.  As a result, we have a cacophony of froggy noise every spring and summer evening.  And, the other little cute things that go along with frogs.  Like frog poop.

Frog poop is not as cute as it sounds.  It is rather large, considering the rectum through which it had to have exited.  And sticky.  This shit sticks to everything, even resisting high pressure hose spray.  Ick.

Today, as I clean and sort and move and schlep, I am encountering lots of it.  But, where there's frog shit...

I have found so many frogs, from smaller-than-a-dime size to two inches long, neon lime green to dull brown green.  They are so cute.  I carry each one in my hand, searching for someone to show it to.  We have always done this.  It's just too good an experience to keep to oneself.

Summer evening, from the rocker on my front porch

Taken by my daughter, Emily

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When we love and laugh with our patient,

we elevate the highest degree of healing, which is inner peace.

                                                                                        --Leslie Gibson